well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
Do vagina's smell?
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
Randomize
