Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Randomize
