Bad news: I had to be at work at 7:15. Good news: no one had used the bathroom yet so I got to defile a freshly cleaned stall
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
Yes dating, but it seems easier to just live in a perpetual state of Netflix, internet porn, and cheese.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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