I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
