can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
Randomize
