Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
you're like an angel sent from heaven to guide my sex life into greatness
Thats so sweet
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