You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize
