I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
they had to take the Corona's out of the fish tank because they wouldn't fit with the mini replica of the roman coliseum in there. so we drank the Corona's. does beer have an expiry date?
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
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