So drunk its hurt
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
