We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
