Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Randomize
