I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
