I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Randomize
