i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
I'm bleeding and have questions
Randomize