id be glad to
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize