New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
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