is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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