We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I told my mom I'm great in bed. That is quality mother daughter bonding.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
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