Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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