you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
I really wasn't that bad. I thought I was pretty tame.
When Anthony passed out you poured vodka on his face
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
Randomize
