There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize