I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
