I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
Randomize
