i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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