my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Whatever I'm getting wasted, my costume's bomb, and there's a good chance I'm getting laid. Not letting stupidity ruin my night!
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
