yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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