This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
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