My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
