This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
Randomize
