so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Randomize