New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
Randomize
