I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize
