There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
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