yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Randomize
