Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
her vagine was all disorganized.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Randomize