a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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