if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize