My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
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