shes about as inviting as chlamydia
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
Randomize
