What the hell am I supposed to do with 50 gallons of mayo?
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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