How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
