i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
