So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
Today some guy at work told me I had the nicest hair he's ever seen and my response was "thanks I grew it myself". This is why I'm single.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
