Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize