When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
I was looking for a pen and I stumbled upon my mom's vibrator. On a related note, yes I will be going out tonight.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
Randomize
