If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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