I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
