Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
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