is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Randomize
