Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Randomize